Finding safe spaces for 2SLGBTQ+ youth at The 519’s Youth Action and Arts Space.

September 21, 2024

Queer and trans youth are still fighting for safe spaces. M and her two kids, Z and T, started coming to The 519’s Youth Action and Arts Space (YAAS) in January, due to a lack of affirming programming in their hometown of Brampton. Z is 10 years old, non-binary and uses he and they pronouns. T is 12, uses she/her pronouns, and identifies as bi.

Sadly, both kids detail homophobic bullying and games played on the playground at school. Z and T describe hearing other kids use the term “gay” as an insult. “A lot,” T says. Z details a time another student tried to shame him about his identity at school.

M says since Z switched schools, his school experience has gone downhill. “It’s a Catholic school, so there’s even fewer supports,” she says. “At the last school, which was also a Catholic school, the principal was amazing, and they had a big Pride flag, but at this one, not so much. When I was explaining Z’s pronouns they were like, ‘Well how do you even do they/them?’ so that’s where they were in terms of their understanding.”

Instances like this are why anti-discriminatory laws in schools and board-wide policies are so important. When safety and dignity aren’t embedded in school policy, then 2SLGBTQ+ students’ school experience comes down to the luck of the draw. Will they have a supportive or unsupportive teacher or principal?

“Z was getting to talk to a child and youth worker, but I wanted something more for them than that,” M says. “I went to PFLAG, a support group for parents of 2SLGBTQ+ kids, and they recommended The 519.”

M brought the kids to YAAS. YAAS is a free, drop-in program that offers 2SLGBTQ+ youth who are 10 to 14 years old a fun place to make new friends. They use art, dance, and music to create spaces where queer and trans youth and families can be their whole selves. T likes watercolour painting, and Z likes to draw.

Z immediately loved YAAS. “I like the kids there! They’re very nice and kind,” Z says. No bullying, no homophobic recess games. Affirming flags, posters and resources everywhere. “It’s really nice to be there. We go on nature walks and I get to show my art.”

M says after their first attendance, Z said, “I’m home.” It made her cry.

T is shy and she took a little longer than Z to feel comfortable. “I was excited to go so I could make new friends,” she says. “There aren’t a lot of people from the LGBTQ+ community in our school.”

M says the YAAS facilitators let T participate as much or as little as she wants.  “It’s really important for them to see other kids like them. It’s also important to see everyone else, the facilitators, the volunteers,” she says. “I want my kids to see all the different ways people can identify so they know they don’t have to fit in little boxes.”

These issues are impossible to discuss without acknowledging the rapid rise in transphobic and queerphobic hatred in Canada, especially towards queer and trans youth. During this interview, the kids are trying to make sense of an upcoming far-right protest targeting queer and trans youth, and supportive families and educators. Twice during the conversation, Z and T both separately asked their mother why the protest was happening. “Why do they hate us?” T asks M.

“Because they have limited thinking,” M says. Watching M try to explain this extremist movement to her children is heartbreaking, and she chooses her words carefully. “They’re not opening their minds to all the ways we can be human.”

They all have similar ideas about what they want for the future. “I want people to respect the LGBTQ+ community, and to stop bullying us,” Z says. “I just want to grow up happy like everyone else.”

“I want a world where I don’t need to worry about my kids feeling accepted and safe at school,” M says. “That would be nice.”

T believes we need to promote understanding and communication. “You’re supposed to love everybody,” she says. “You can have your beliefs, but beliefs shouldn’t be discrimination. Then you’re just raising people to hate each other.”

Youth Action and Arts Space meets on Saturday afternoons. Learn more about YAAS here.