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Managing Expectations 

December 13, 2024

Life is full of expectations. Ones we have for ourselves, and ones we have for other people. After school programs were a formative part of Morgan’s childhood. When Morgan had a kid of her own, she wanted to pass that tradition on. 

“I had so many positive experiences . . . and I had all these hopes and expectations that my child would do the same,” Morgan says. “When my kid came out as non-binary in second grade, they started telling me that the programs I had loved as a young person weren’t working for them. They weren’t having the same experience as me.” 

Morgan’s child is named Faith. They’re 11 years old, and they use they and he pronouns. Morgan’s friend told them about Kids Action and Arts Space (KAAS) at The 519, and they began bringing their kids together. Faith now takes part in the Youth Action and Arts Space (YAAS). 

KAAS and YAAS are free, drop-in programs that offers 2SLGBTQ+ kids and youth a fun place to make new friends. They use art, dance, and music to create spaces where queer and trans youth and families can be their whole selves. 

Faith has a tough time at their small school. “At my school everyone is straight and homophobic,” they say. “People say ‘gay’ as an insult all the time. It’s just disappointing.” 

Faith and Morgan attend a local church, though Faith is nonreligious. It is an affirming space they both enjoy very much. Students at Faith’s school have told Faith they believe his non-binary identity is unholy. Actually, Faith and Morgan’s church is completely accepting, and it is people outside of their community attempting to dictate who belongs there and who doesn’t. 

“When people say God created man and woman and there’s nothing in-between, I like to remind them that God created the night and the day, but that doesn’t mean that we don’t have dawn and dusk,” says Morgan. 

Faith likes coming to The 519 to be around other queer and trans kids. “It makes me feel much better when I’m around other kids like me,” he says. “I’m used to being around kids who just make fun of me and couldn’t care less about how I identify.” 

“It’s really nice to see Faith making so many friends at KAAS and YAAS,” Morgan says. “Faith is having the kinds of experiences that I hoped they would have through Guiding, but through this space they’re happy to be in, and that doesn’t make them feel marginalized.” 

Morgan says YAAS helps Faith get through school. “I’ve noticed when Faith goes to YAAS they are able to handle the kids at school better, because it’s a reminder that school is not their only world,” she says. 

“It’s really fun when we make origami. I also like watercolours. Acrylic paint is goopy and watercolours are just easier, but my favourite activity is Rickrolling Erin,” Faith says. Rickrolling of course is the act of tricking someone into listening to or watching the music video for the 1987 hit synthpop song Never Gonna Give You Up by British singer Rick Astley — something Faith has successfully done to YAAS coordinator Erin O’Brien multiple times. 

Faith says they aren’t asking for much. “All I wish is that people at the very least would just be okay with the fact that there are people who are trans and queer. They don’t even really have to like it, just respect it,” they say. “When they’re disrespectful it makes everyone less respectful to each other.” 

Youth Action and Arts Space meets on Saturday afternoons. Learn more about YAAS here.